Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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