I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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