happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
she peed on how many people?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
