The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
