I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
