rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
