Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
