you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
