Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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