Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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