Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
