So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
false alarm, still single
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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