how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
