youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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