oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
