we have officially lost it.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize