forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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