Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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