shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
wakey wakey hands off snakey
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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