i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
