I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
