She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
