I love black thongs
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
