Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
