Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize