What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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