i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
