She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro