carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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