I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
