And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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