A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
