Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I skipped work to stalk him.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
