super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I need a burrito and a hug.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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