Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
