i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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