the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Randomize
