I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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