OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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