But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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