Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize