I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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