Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great