That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
