Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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