I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
