a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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