She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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