U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
