my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
